There’s a thing I always say to my friends when I begin to describe Holy Ship!: “There’s no reason that this boat should exist, but I’m really glad it does.” To try and accurately depict the experience of sailing on the MSC Divina with close to 4,000 of the world’s most devoted electronic music fans to a person outside of the scene, is like trying to eat spaghetti with a spoon. It just ain’t happening.
The Holy Ship! February sailing took place February 10th – 13th, but ask anyone who was on onboard–we’re all still swaying. Holy Ship! is the ultimate mindfuck. No cell phone service, no responsibilities, no bedtimes and no shortage of pizza (24-hours a day!). It’s the ultimate come to a higher power for music lovers and thrill seekers, and, it was ultimately the event that would make me set sail for uncharted waters in my life.
Leaving the Port of Miami on the MSC Divina during Holy Ship! February 2016 “Sail Away Party”
Holy Ship! is a place where people go to party like they are either being checked into rehab at the end of their sailing, or, handed a tiny infant for which they must care for the next 18 years. In other words, this event is brought to you in part by getting turnt as shit, and sponsored by 0 fux given aside safety (in collaboration with the real presenters of course, which include Cloud 9 Adventures, HARD Events and The Bowery Presents). But still, I had some skepticism returning to Holy Ship! as a second year attendee. Would it be as magical as my initial voyage? Would I make the same rookie mistakes? Would the show go on without Skrillex making a surprise appearance every 8 minutes? Would I come home questioning everything in my life AGAIN? Holy Ship! is a sprint, and winning the race is a delicate work of art. I’m back in New York City now and I may be single, homeless and writing the next chapter in life, but regardless, I know I crushed it aboard Holy Ship!; did you?
After standing in line for what felt like an eternity on Wednesday, my crew and I finally found ourselves standing outside the Divina’s glorious crystal staircase. Well, everyone except our friend Tyler whose bag got flagged by customs because of two giant stuffed seahorses and an array of tinsel wigs (No officers, he doesn’t have drugs in his bags, he just like the rest of us prefers to live that giant toddler life).
Day one is often a game of touch and go. It’s about unpacking, decorating your door, getting the lay of the land and attempting to find solid footing, even though it will inevitably be ripped out from under you by day 3. After some mandatory safety drills, it was time for general ratchetry.
The notorious Life Jacket safety demo before setting sail
Baauer and RL Grime kicked off the “sail away party” with a kickin B2B (Back to Back) that got the crowd raging. The pool deck stage was a thing of magic that night as bass acts like Boys Noize and Jauz rocked the party in the open sea air. House fans shook their tail feathers in the Black and White Lounge where Dirtybird Players like Justin Martin and Will Clarke dominated the decks. They were joined by surprise guest Claude VonStroke, the boss of Dirtybird Records, crowd-proclaimed king of Holy Ship!, and, unmatched party animal.
Claude VonStroke enjoying himself at the Dirtybird Allstars throwdown in the Black & White Lounge
The Slovenian producer turned Brooklyn funk guru Gramatik kept the energy alive in the theatre, pounding out new tracks from his upcoming release Epigram, while Flux Pavilion closed-out the night with some face melting UK dubstep.
Flux Pavilion bringing the UK bass on the Pool Deck
Flux might have had us screaming “I Can’t Stop” moments earlier, but I could. And I did, around 6:30 AM. Veteran “shippers” attempt to get sleep on night one, because you’ll find it’s fleeting as the days progress (after all the Holy Ship! schedule plays out more like one really long day with a few half-ass naps sprinkled in).
Claude VonStoke up to his antics while supporting one of the members of Dirtybird Records, Ardalan
My squad got up relatively early to make the most of our day in the the capital city of Nassau, and largest of the 700+ islands of the Bahamas, where the curse of the cancelled beach party would finally be broken. Due to choppy water and other technical problems in the past, going to the destination has been called off due to the safety risks. It’s a bummer, but really in patrons’ best interest.
Alex Metric, Felix Da Housecat, along with special guest of the Holy Ship! Fish Fry, Claude VonStroke, brought a medley of classic disco and house grooves to a secluded coastal cove in Nassau. Tchami and DJ Snake brought amped up party vibes as the beach rager tore into the late afternoon.
Holy Shippers heading to the Holy Ship! Fish Fry on Nassau in the Bahamas
Flags, inflatables, and rave booty, flew freely through the crowd as fans celebrated the fact that they were finally able to get off the massive ship. My friends and I saw the drink ticket line and opted for conch fritters and booze just outside the venue, shamelessly enjoying music, sun and way, way, way too much booze. I would love to know if anyone got left behind on that island, after talking to two sauced-up Aussies who had forgotten their passports (and most likely their own names), I see this as a very probable event.
Night two got weird. By 8PM, “Under the Sea” theme night was in full force with mermaids and sharks leading the fun. Also lots of clown costumes. What the fuck was with the clown costumes? Did I miss the memo? Chromeo brought a much welcome palate cleanser to a jam-packed crowd in the giant venue inside the ship, called the Pantheon Theater. The Funklordz’ high energy live set brought some of the best audience participation of the weekend with group chants, girls on shoulders and plenty of witty banter that got the crowd on point.
Chromeo rocking the only completely live set in the Pantheon Theater onboard the MSC Divina
After I had sufficiently Come Alive, it was a mad dash to the pool deck for the much-buzzed about, LED-masked DJ, Marshmello (In case you’re one of the many wondering who the masked beat maker is, DotCom was all over that ship, so mystery solved–you’re welcome!), and, the bass blaster turned shoegazer, Porter Robinson.
Marshmello at the end of not getting blinded by flashes due to his LED mask
Porter’s DJ set was a beautiful reimagining of his recent Worlds Tour, scaled down slightly for the boat in terms of instruments, but by no means in energy. Many agreed that this was the most connected and exhilarated Porter had seemed on stage in some time.
Porter Robinson during night two’s rager
As the night roared on, the vibes were thick, the bass was heavy and the eyes were wide. I swear everyone on the boat was on another planet Thursday night. And it was refreshing. We had started to reach that beautiful point of letting go. The top deck became a roller rink for the now several-wheelchair bound passengers onboard as RL Grime played a melodic set that differed drastically from his trap heavy B2B from the previous night with Baauer.
After a second, somewhat disappointing helping of Flux (he played what seemed to be the exact same set as the previous night) I made my way to the theatre for the “Pardon my French” showcase where the masked crusaders of MALAA and Shibe San blasted ethereal tracks to a room full of fucked up jellyfish. By this point of the night I had evolved from girl in a weird body cape to full blown majestic sea flap flap. The vibes were so good, I couldn’t stop grooving.
MALAA stealing the show in the Pantheon Theater
DJ Snake got the theater turned up as we headed to catch Boys Noize in the Black and White. His dark, pulsing set must have been casting sea spells, because I heard a mermaid tried to offer herself to the LA-based producer to no avail. Silly mermaid. Come back when you can split legs!
Then it was time to stumble aimlessly or opt for a nap before reemerging for the Sunrise Sermon, which really is the closest thing you’ll have to a religious experience on that ship. There’s something about watching the sun peek over a seemingly endless stretch of water while downing champagne and smiling stupidly as all of the ship’s MVPs come together to create EDM’s most exclusive after-hours party. You may be exhausted, but that’s no match for the euphoria that Hard Events founder and main curator of Holy Ship!, Gary Richards better known by his stage name DESTRUCTO. and friends deliver by means of jazzed up house standards and even some new originals like Anna Lunoe’s “Shipfam Anthem” which she debuted live that morning.
Anna Lunoe turning it up in the Black & White
The move after the Sunrise Sermon seemed to be The Black Crab restaurant, where you can sit and have 15 servers pour you a cup of coffee. The staff to customer ratio in that place was noteworthy, and, our entire table agreed we felt like the Queen of England while we ate our eggs benedicts and second-rate hashbrowns (MSC culinary staff, if you’re reading this, bring back the triangles!). Then it was time for one of those half-assed naps I mentioned earlier.
Holy Shippers feeling the love during Gary Richards’ Sunrise Sermon
I playfully refer to Day 3 as LIT AS SHIT Day. The final stretch of any festival is always my favorite, because I love a good challenge. I prefer to reach deep into untapped sources of energy and really let the freak flag fly. A trip to the buffet gave my squad and I a chance to really show the people on the ship how much we cared by writing out a number of “Certificates of Recognition.” Some lucky recipients took home awards in the categories of “Most DTF”, “Goofiest Boobs”, and “Darkest Thoughts”, among others. Congratulations to all of our winners! You are the heart and soul of Holy Ship!. You also let me be a close talker, and for that, you are heroes.
We were all about that water slide until the staff rained on our parade and shut it down. Then we swung by the Hip-Hop pool party where Yahtzel was spinning those tracks that made us want to get our high school grind on. It was a perfect sunny day on the pool deck while acts like Aussie beach babe, Thomas Jack, mysterious masked DJ, Claptone, and LA’s own, SNBRN, let their breezy beats take us away, and inevitably into another overpriced bottle of champagne. Meanwhile, Jauz and Marshmello were hosting a spirited round of Jauz Karaoke in the Golden Jazz Lounge when I tried my best to sneak a lot on stage and failed. Big ups to the guy who tore up “I Want It That Way” by the Backstreet Boys though, because that was dope.
Thomas Jack getting tropical on the Pool Deck
As the sun began to set, we knew it was time for naps and our next game of dress up. Subset’s debut Holy Ship! performance in the Pantheon Theater takes the cake for most enthusiastic crowd (should have given out a certificate . . . regrets). I quickly realized my green cape and “Bernie Sanders is Magical” tank was dwarfed in a sea of men in Wonder Woman costumes.
Subset dropping the beats for a plethora of Wonder Women
When the New York-based bass DJ took the stage, you could feel the crackle of energy in the room as the crowd went absolutely ape shit. It was the perfect way to get amped for one last night of debauchery. The pool deck was bringing serious girl power with Mau5trap’s Rezz bringing her brand of dark and mesmerizing beats. While her sound is impressive for such a new talent, I felt that her three sets (pre-party, theater and pool deck) could have benefitted from some variety.
Mija was up next, absolutely smashing the decks with unexpected drops and new Skrillex collaborations. I kept wishing for a helicopter drop-in, but alas, no Sonny this time. Oliver gave me a reason to swing through the Galaxy Disco before hitting the pool deck again to rage with the Hard Father himself, Gary Richards, who played a booming set of signature deep house and hip-hop infused tracks.
Sunrise during DESTRUCTO’s set during the Sunrise Sermon
The main event of the night for me, and perhaps of the entire ship was the Jauz B2B Marshmello set in the Pantheon Theater. WE VIBING! Seriously, did anyone else transcend during that set? The two of them are magic incarnate. Whether they were pulsing out their own signature singles or filtering through Adele, Kanye and R. Kelly remixes they had the crowd in their hands. I think there were tears.
Marshmello and Jauz showing their love for one another during their final set in the Pantheon Theater
Our squad split at this point, and I’d chased enough bass, so I headed to the Golden Jazz to close out the night with Soul Clap’s classic house set, while Justin Martin also closed things out in the Galaxy Disco. It was the perfect way to close the books on Holy Ship!, and close the books on a specific time of my life. As silly as it sounds, Holy Ship! has a way of making you realize the possibilities that are out there. I truly think it’s impossible to step foot on that boat, let go of yourself and your hangups, if only for a few days, and not come out a little different.
Soul Clap representin’ at their autograph session
For me, the biggest takeaway was “why settle?” That’s the magic of Holy Ship!. That’s the power of “Shipfam.” When you’re surrounded by the essence of “spectacular,” you will find yourself inspired to be the best person you can be. This means it might be time to get rid of that job that’s no longer serving you. It might be your year to finally take a chance and move to that exciting new city that’s brimming with boundless opportunities. Or in my case, if you’re not in love with the person you’ve been living with for the last six years, it’s only fair that you let them go.
So yeah, I got home and decided it was time to make some big changes in my life. A shipper that I met on the top deck during Flux Pavilion’s Thursday night set showed up at my house with boxes and packing tape. Another shipper helped me load up her car and move me to a temporary apartment. And a whole crew of other shippers offered me love, support and words of wisdom. Holy Ship! February 2016 changed my life. I’m single and I’m definitely still looking for an apartment in NYC, so if you know of anything, you better holler at your girl. And, you should probably go ahead and figure out how to get a “Token“ for next year’s sailings, too.